The Trance of Fear

The Trance of Fear

Early this morning I fell into the most beautiful lucid dream state. It was coupled with this physical sense of buoyancy. The kind of lightness one feels having just dropped all the weight and the burdens upon arriving home from wearing all the heavy armor one wears to move through their day in their outer world.

Although the details escape me now, I recall riding a bicycle on a beautiful residential street with gorgeous trees on both sides on what seemed to be a lovely. As I pedaled my way, I looked ahead to notice that I was approaching a bit of an uphill and an oncoming car. A few things ensued quickly – something indicated to my brain that I must pedal faster and somehow get out of the way of the car although I’m not sure if it was even a narrow street or an irrational imaginary anticipation; as well a fear of whether I’d be able to pedal faster or fast enough or at all.

Juxtapositioned with these fearful thoughts that seemed to have risen without my conscious awareness was this sense of ease with which I was pedaling – a contradiction to what my anticipatory mind had conjured at lightening speed. It was so easeful it woke me up to a waking state of disbelief.

All day I had to wonder about the message here. Then suddenly it occurred to me how we humans quickly decide things will be hard before we even step into taking action; perhaps because of an inherited wound or narrative or thanks to the endless social conditionings at work. I realized it only takes a brief visual image or a sound to set off the alarms that have been pre-conditiomed in the narrows of our mind. It overrides our inherent capacity to rely on our belief and faith that things could be just as easeful as we instantaneously imagined they’d be dreadful, difficult, impossible or unbearable.

As well that the oncoming traffic/ uphill, that is life, will come and go and we will move uphill at times with some sweat and trepidation and at times with unexpected ease, may be even some pleasantness. But as long as we don’t let the fears stop us dead in our tracks, there will also be a breeze that brings unexpected ease. Not to mention the inevitable thrills and gifts of sorts that come with the eventuality of a downhill that often follows every uphill.

I share this partly in reverence of the inner work of our psyches, inviting you my reading friends to pay attention to your dreams as guides. As well as a pretext to this lovely article on fear as a trance by Tara Brach and how mindfulness and compassion could be tools to help one shake themselves out of this trance.